It snowed last week! Must be April in Pittsburgh and time for another news quiz!
1. A North Carolina man achieved internet fame with a home security video that depicted:
a) Georgia Republicans drinking Coca-Cola at a gay rights picnic
b) His wife being attacked by a rabid bobcat that he successfully pulled away from her and threw across the couple’s lawn
c) Deleted footage from “The Andy Griffith Show” showing Sheriff Andy beating his son Opie with a hickory switch while a drunken Aunt Bee laughed
2. After successfully landing the Perseverance rover on Mars in February, NASA engineers made further history last Monday by:
a) Admitting that the rover had been assembled from a Lego kit
b) Finding the Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator used by Marvin the Martian in Looney Tunes shorts
c) Successfully flying the Ingenuity helicopter that the rover carried
3. The makers of Busch beer shook up the industry by announcing that they would market:
a) “Brewhaha,” a beer so highly carbonated that its bubbles will go up your nose and make you laugh
b) “Dog Brew,” a non-alcoholic drink for dogs made from bone-in pork butt, whole corn, celery, basil, mint, turmeric, ginger and water
c) “Biden Brew,” with a specially tuned pop-top hole that says,” C’mon, man!” when opened
4. Apple has announced AirTag, a device designed to help you track and find lost items. Apple says the device can be attached to a key fob or slipped into, say, a backpack or wallet. If the item is lost, your iPhone can be used to track it and lead you to it. What drawbacks might develop?
a) People might use AirTag to secretly track philandering spouses, leading to a rise in divorce rates.
b) All the Airtags in the world won’t help if you’ve lost your phone.
c) Microsoft’s competing tracking device – WhereYinzAt’n’At? – might sell better in Pittsburgh.
5. It’s official. Another “Downton Abbey” movie will appear in theaters this coming Christmas. What plot twists might the Crawley family and servants face this time?
a) Matthew, thought to have been killed in a car crash at the end of Season 3, actually rolled down the hill into a ditch, struck his head on a rock, developed amnesia and has been living as a character in “Days of Our Lives” ever since.
b) Mr. Carson and Mrs. Hughes will be shocked to learn that Season 3 was actually only a dream – a fact revealed when Lady Mary discovers Matthew in the shower.
c) There will be no plot. Cast members will wander randomly through the abbey saying, “Egad!” “My word! and “Cheerio!”
6. The Mrs. Sri Lanka pageant went slightly awry last week when:
a) A former holder of the title forcibly took the crown off the winner’s head and falsely claimed she was a divorcee and thus ineligible to take part.
b) The televised flight of NASA’s Ingenuity helicopter drew a larger audience share than the pageant.
c) Former President Donald Trump suddenly appeared onstage, claimed that the voting was fixed and he had received more votes than the contest’s winner “by a lot.”